This is my first attempt at making a video, and I am pleased with the result, I hope you all enjoy it!
Video Transcript:
How would you describe the passage of time? Does it read from left to right, like a book? The title of this content would suggest so, I mean the word passage is a synonym for text.
How ironic.
I would describe the passage of time as unapologetic.
Time knows no master; time is something that predates as old as existence – they were created in tandem after all. But unlike existence, time never knows when to stop.
It’s funny how we try to quantify the passage of time as constant cycles, but that is also incorrect; life knows cycles, time only understand continuance.
Time’s continuance is known to everything. Time’s continuance is what robs us of joyous moments we wished lasted forever. Time’s continuance is also what lifts us from lasting moments of sorrow that we thought would never end. No matter how much we desire to stay in one place, we will never win against time.
Time flows as a line within empty space, once it is introduced to gravitational forces of matter, only then does it start to shift and morph. At our basic level, we are matter, so in turn, as time flows around us, it distorts. Sometimes time feels as if it’s trudging, and other times it feels as if we can’t keep up. Time is subjective, like many other things, to its beholder. For myself, it shifts and changes based upon my state of being, my emotions, and my surroundings. All these factors play into my perception of its passage.
In this segment of time that we labeled as 2020, everyone’s tolerance for ambiguity was tested. To be honest, in this allowance of time, I had hit my deepest mental low. It was as if solitude hit me with a brick. The events and the people I would fill my time with were now replaced with loneliness.
Without the regular stimuli, I had realized that I’ve only been going through the motions. I’d only fill my time with those things that would bring myself fleeting happiness, but in these pursuits, I found that the only thing that would fill in the gaps of happiness is dread.
By only focusing on maintaining a constant state of happiness, we avoid all of life’s other stimuli, the sadness, the joy, the fear, the excitement, and the contentment. To be alive is to be stimulated, and to only find one avenue for stimuli, life becomes mundane, and in turn, filled with anguish.
I am filled with anguish.
2020 forced myself into my own company, and into my own mind. The person I criticize most is myself, and the place that I am most uncomfortable with is within my own thoughts. By doing so it made me face not only my thoughts, but my own desires for myself, and in those months isolated I realized I needed to reevaluate my means of achieving those desires.
I had always longed to live a happy life, but happiness is only one piece of the puzzle. Longing for happiness only brings about stagnation, and with stagnation comes anxiety. With anxiety comes the time for continuation down the passage. Time will never allow myself to stay in one spot because it must push things forward.
To look for only happiness was foolish, and now I realize that in order to be complete, I must find what fulfills me. I must find what gives me my purpose. Whatever my purpose is yet to still be discovered, but I now realize I must be as continuous as time, allowing myself to enjoy pleasure, live through sorrow, but never dwell.
I must be as unapologetic as time with all my decisions and walk my passage undisturbed by other’s timelines for me.
